"All I want is to be happy" - Don't.

"All I want is to be happy."
Foolish, I think.

I recall when I was young, the life goal of people was "to have a lot of money". The modern capitalist world was born and money encompassed the potential to realize all our dreams and desires.

It seems we are now in the maturity of a paradigm shift toward a life goal of people just to be "happy". The pursuit of money has reached its own advanced maturity - the market has stabilized and having a lot money no longer means having a lot of money, but much more money than others who want a lot of money. We are comforted with our shifted perspective on the paradigm to think money doesn't bring happiness - so why not cut out the middle man and go straight for happiness. It's true; "Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to deal with" (anonymous).

Now we have people trying to be happy. Happy with everything; jobs, friends, relationships, life. And our culture is more confused than ever. How the hell do you get happiness? Well the common approaches are:

a) Be happy with your life by lowering your standard of acceptable living.
This entails telling yourself: "I can be happy with my job if I realize you could be doing something worse." "I can be happy in my relationship if I realize I'm worse-off without one."

b) Live everyday like it's your last.
This involves occasional to frequent drug-use, defaulting on bill payments, having the aspirations of a moose and the attention span of a deer.

People are confused in this search for happiness. I liken it to chasing the carrot on the stick, or chasing the end of a rainbow.

I'll come out and write it:
It's foolish to pursue happiness. It's foolish because it's irresponsible and unreasonable.
People are living the ways that benefit themselves without consideration for others. They have consideration for others if and only if it makes them happy. This is irresponsible.

The pursuit of happiness means being happy in the meadow because the hill is to hard to climb even though there may be more prosperous land. This is unreasonable.

What? You are one bitter, bitter man, Doug
No. Lemme offer an option for being happy.

It is best to enjoy happiness, and appreciate happiness, than to pursue it and suffer its absence.

So what do we do instead, smart ass?
Ahem.

I think we should seek to be motivated. Suffer the pains as they come and enjoy the happiness as it comes.

I think we intuitively know this, on some level. Being busy, effective, with a routine and direction gives a sense of purpose and direction. It's not easy, not always happy and not always sad. But it's motivating. At times we may be happier being at home changing channels and eating chips. But after some point we feel useless - because we're demotivated.

The scope can be wider than that.

Some are willing to put aside their false-pursuit of happiness to pursue University. For those who see a grand purpose, use and value in higher studies take on the responsibilities of suffering the pains of going to class, studying for exams and meeting deadlines. But the experience is motivating, and although the completion of University studies only promises more work in life to complete, one enjoys the happiness of having direction from motivation.

I've said it many times; the slope of a mountain defines its peak. We know we have reached the top when we start to go down. You can't always keep going up and you can't stay on the top forever. Soon you can have your sights on higher mountains.

Happiness and motivation are not mutually exclusive - both can be interwined. The most rewarding happiness is when we benefit from the fruits of our labour.

If all you want in life is happiness, can you still be happy looking back at your life knowing you could be so much more?

Feeling politically sick

Like most of the world, I've been reeling over the US elections.

Uncertainty can be so stressful. I don't know what's going to happen. I knew I'd be reeling despite the outcome - but it's still an unnerving occurrence. I haven't felt this way since the onset of the Iraqi war - it's a weird feeling.

Don't get me wrong, I am hardly pre-occupied with the United States. Even less now being in Hong Kong. It's the consequences for the rest of the world and the increasing civil unrest. The images are difficult for me to see - whenever I see people having to risk so much for defending democracy. Whether it's a soldier fighting for what they think is right in Iraq or a protester getting arrested for pushing at a police barricade in New York. It shouldn't come to this - ever.

It's a daunting question for me: How many more people have to risk it all? Even more daunting for me: How many more people do we have left?

We should be better than this.
Looking back I'll know how it ended - if it does end - and I'll relax on the knowledge that I know it's over.
But now I can only look forward and hope it will end fast with the least pain.

Blog plug
To save time but still put worthwhile updates on my blog,
I think I'll just copy and paste chat conversations I've had.
Here we go.

Disclaimer:
To ensure discretion - I've ensured to chat only with people who have one-letter names to make it super-obvious who it is. If you don't know the person, well, forget it.
If your first name has more than one letter - you need not worry about chat convos with me.
The chat may or may not be modified to suit the monthly editorial theme.
This month's editorial theme is: "Harper's Bazar".

Conversation 1

d: Still think there'll be a civil war?

T: The evidence is mounting of massive vote fraud see http://www.blackboxvoting.org and I think that once the word hits the mainstream media, it is on the cards. But it will be preceded by civil strife and martial law. I'm not the only one who thinks so.

See
http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/civilwar.html

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0929408179/002-8077346-8384046?v=glance

Conversation 2

D: The US elections got me physically sick.
Haven't felt that way since the onset of war in Iraq.

J: I know what you mean
We are all feeling sick over it

D: so I don't know about political life.
not because I might get physically sick - I think that's from the feeling of powerlessness...
but that I don't see any practicality to idealist thought anymore.
I'm losing faith in my presumptions.
I used to think reason and morals are the progressive forces of a civilised society, but I think, increasingly, it's really power and coercion.
I don't know.
But if you find out, please tell me.
Because I need to know.

J: I get you Doug. I feel the same way, and well, Unfortunately I think you are right. . but the light at the end of the tunnel is- that maybe balance is needed. There is too much right and too much left- and both sides need there needs met. I'm personally frusterated with the blind idealism on one end, and the pure greed on the other.
It's a hard one.
It feels like our baloons have popped

D: yeah, there's little in the middle for us.

J: no you're not. you are understandbly fed up. We need a political revolution of some kind. I'm all out of ideas

D: The right are taking the table away and the left are far left in their corner protesting.
I want to help bring the right to the left, but I look around and there's no one.

I think morals cross boundaries - morals such as tolerance and respect for human rights, examples of accepted driving forces for social change worldwide. I think these can be communicated to the right - and they have reformed the right (such as reforms in slave labour and freedom of speech), there is further potential to change the right.

J: true...

D: Radical leftists dispense with the rule of law and a just society.
That their movement and revolution is just at all costs. That's where they split from mainstream left.
I accept the rule of law and a just society.
And the rule of law that supports a just society has been reformed by both leftist and right-wing reforms in the past.

J: but what I'm confused about is, it seems we can't alter the capitalist globalization phase we are going through, greed is greed period, more people are making more off of those who get less.... how can we work around that, if change will not happen. I think we think we can change people, but when it comes to greed I feel its almost impossible.
thats one area progress is at a stand still

D: I am becoming increasingly worried only a revolution will reallign a government's position above companies.

J: exactly
I'm worried too

D: continuing to demand more of our governments and trying to hold them accountable is becoming increasingly difficult and ineffectivec.

Link dept.
It takes a while to download if you're not on broadband, but it's worth the wait!
http://www.churchoftherobot.org/dangsquid/abd.mov